What Is Spiritual or Religious Trauma?

You have likely heard of various types of traumas or traumatic experiences. There are many, and each is important. Each affects humans deeply. One newer or not-as-spoken-about experience is that of spiritual or religious trauma. There’s not much literature or information about it, yet. It’s less known (or at the very least, less talked about) and yet has been around for years.

You might wonder, what is spiritual or religious trauma?

It does seem important to distinguish between spiritual and religious trauma – while there is an interconnectivity. I’ll refer to it as religious trauma for the sake of this piece.

Religion often depicts more of an external experience such as attending a church, (or other place of worship). And, spirituality typically reflects a more internal experience or connection. Today, I will be use the word religion. It’s important to highlight that spiritual trauma very much exists and is as deeply wounding as that of adverse religious experiences. While it is no less horrific than any other trauma, religious trauma is tricky in that is can happen to many people at the same time, while everyone is silently suffering. This can be because of the hierarchical structure which often depicts church leadership.

If you have experienced hurt from the church or can reflect on moments of hurt from clergy or others within the church in positions of authority, I am so sorry. This was not anything did or did not do. And, it is certainly in no way reflecting of your inherent goodness. This may have caused you to question much about yourself as well as your place or being of worship.

Another important piece to notice is that spirituality is, in and of itself a good, healthy practice. Spirituality can bring you peace, healing, fulfillment, a sense of purpose and other resilience building experiences. It can help you process emotional stress. Spirituality – healthy spirituality – is good.

You may also have had many experiences where the church is good. Healthy. Healing. It can be a place filled with people you love, you connect with and with whom you experience safety. If this has not been your experience however, it is not because there is anything intrinsically wrong with you. And again, I am so sorry your experience has been difficult.

The Religious Trauma Institute defines adverse religious experiences (or religious trauma) as: “Any experience of a religious belief, practice or structure that undermines an individual’s sense of safety or autonomy and/or impacts their physical, social, emotional, relational, or psychological well-being.”

Can we pause for a moment?

Can you notice how you feel in your body, as you read that quote? If we can hold space for you to notice even a twinge of how you hold those words, you are stepping into the practice of honouring yourself. This is compassionate. This is human. And, this is a healing experience. Part of my work with clients in the area of religious trauma includes noticing how your body is affected and responds. The response from adverse experiences within the religious context can be dysregulating and scary. Noticing these with a trusted professional can feel safer and more possible.

As with any trauma, your nervous system is entirely disrupted and dysregulated. For some, this might happen once. For many, it might continue for years. Because of the insidious nature of some church structures, the extreme difficulty in this is the secrecy around it. If you notice religion (practicing your religion, attending a place of worship) brings with it a sense of fear – you may have experience religious trauma. If you notice a sense of safety, love and non-judgement you are more likely worshipping and experiencing belonging in a healthy space.

As with most traumas, the experience and residual effect is held in your body. Religious trauma is no different in this way. This somatic experience or hurt can dampen some of how you process what you need, and how you integrate that or other traumas. You might notice it is harder to cultivate an awareness of what you need, in particular if you’ve experienced religious trauma.

Within an unhealthy religious structure, many decisions may have been made for you. This might leave you with feelings of uncertainty or fear. You worry that you won’t be able to perform or act in a way that is acceptable to those within the religious context. When you have to perform to belong, your experience is unhealthy. When an environment is created more out of rules and stipulations than love and compassion, this is a red flag.

If you can honour your body by noticing what your emotions might be telling you, you can begin to grow curious. In this space, you can begin to cultivate an awareness of what is okay and not okay. For example, noticing that the day before you plan to attend your place of worship that you get sick, your head hurts, or you are carrying an uncomfortable emotions…this might be indicative of how your body is anticipating this experience based on the past.

 

How can you begin to navigate healing from spiritual or religious trauma?

I encourage individuals to reach out for support. The feelings of isolation and aloneness that stem from this type of trauma are extremely painful. Sitting with a professional to navigate through this process and moreover, heal, is so important.

 

You may be able to find others who have also experienced religious trauma. As humans we are all biologically wired for connection. In this context, it can be so healing and powerful. In the absence of another human, I suggest a couple of pieces by Dr Hillary McBride. I invite you to go slow and listen to your body as you either listen to, or read the following suggestions:

• Holy Hurt (podcast). This take a serious, gentle and very informative approach to religious trauma.
• The Wisdom of Your Body (book). This book guides the reader to better understand how stress and trauma are experienced and processed within the body. She also addresses the spirit-body divide.

Finally, as you are able (and with the support of the above), create some boundaries with your religious context. This might mean never attending again. Or, it could mean something more subtle or seemingly less black and white for you. Again, having trusted other(s) weigh in and becoming more introspective to learn about yourself is key to this process.

If you are curious to learn more and begin healing from religious trauma, I invite you to reach out. Together, we can begin to grow curious about your experiences and how they have affected and even harmed you. You can begin to process these, feel safe and notice what feels authentic and safe for you.